Jamie's blog

My unlikely riding partner is a thick set man with a full head of curly hair, he is Anti from Rome, Italy.   Anti is all togged up in a jump suite and me in my sculpting gear.  I have done this once before and remember that you can get pretty cold, especially whilst sat as a passenger on the sled.  But in this case, I was going to get a go at driving.

Our guide shipped us into the middle of nowhere, snow blanketing the ground and bending the trees, a mixture of whites and greys with a pink tint in the sky of the early morning.  And then the barking.

“They know that they are going to run.”  This was our guide Ula, a round faced Finn, quite plump but as I would learn exceptionally fit.  The barking grew even more intense as we approached, Ula then stopped us at a rickety looking sled on the path way.  “I will show you how to use the sled here so that you can here what I’m saying.”  This was a good call as an eruption of howling filed the crystal air.  “To turn the sled lean from side to side like with skis.  The most important thing is that for the first 500 meters to use the break as the dogs really want to run, they will calm down after a while.  And if you stop do not take your foot of the break as the dogs will just leave you.”  Stranded in the arctic tundra with an Italian, I think we would have managed somehow.

We walked to the dogs who greeted us with joyous barks, “they are very friendly, you can stroke them if you like.”  I took the queue and went to greet each of my faithful companions so long as I stayed on the sled.  These are very handsome dogs, real huskies with their blue eyes, but they wanted to get going and were not so interested in my greetings, so before we knew it we were on the sled, Anti ready to drive first and the dogs bouncing all over the place ready to run, tugging on the reigns, urging the brake to be released.

And released it was, we shifted like a bullet out of a barrel but with total silence; dogs do not bark when they run, but they do like to shit a lot and have seemingly mastered it on the move, some dragging their bums on the floor to help things along, occasionally taking in a gulp of snow to quench their thirst or cool down.

After we took a corner and then fell off the sled it seemed a good time for me to have a go.  The dogs do not like to stop and are so eager to move, ready to leave you stranded.  I wonder how far they would run without us.  After Anti had safely got himself seated I took my foot off the break and we sped forward with silent speed again, it is the opposite to motor travel, the faster you go the more quiet it is.  Occasionally you need to take your weight off the sled and run to help the dogs up a hill, and then hold on tight when you go down it at speed, taking care to learn into the corners and shout “Mush!  Good dogs now and again.”  I’m not sure you had to say that but I enjoyed it anyway.  Once past the hills we were on the flats again where you could take in the glorious scenery and contemplate that right now it is just us and the dogs and the crunching of snow under the sled.  The smell of poo was a little distracting.

We travelled 20km in total and warmed up with a hot drink in the tepee by the fire, the smoke spiraling upwards.  Here I saw an old dog come out of the shadows who had a rather regal manner about her and natural authority.   She strode up to me, pelt black and white, blue eyes looking straight at me.  She was the Alpha female Nina, head of all the dogs and I think Ula’s favourite, a companion of 12 years and still sometimes running, but only with Ula.

I just got in and can feel the frost still nipping at my cheeks.  Yesterday there was a storm here and although it was only -8 we had to walk against the wind on our way to work it was so strong.  The Finns call this ice hotel ‘Lumillina’ which means ’snow castle.’ This was never more appropriate than yesterday as the wind battered against the ramparts but protected those who were inside which was all of our team on the decision of Kimmo.  The only sign of the tempest outside was the stricken faces of those coming in from the blizzard outside and of the cold wind blowing through the tunnels.  For the past few days I’ve been making some jewelry and chess pieces, one of which is noticeably phallic; refer to the photographs.  My task for yesterday however was to make a necklace as the doorway to the gallery.  My eyes were streaming with tears as I was blasted by the tunneling wind against me, two hours in and I noticed that my chin was freezing as my beard gathered the frost.  Time to put on my balaclava from Timo.

“Tomorrow Jamie, I need you to go outside.”  This was the harsh news from Kimmo as we enjoyed a few drinks with the international students last night.  I was going to work on another ice wall inside but it seems that we have quite a lot to do on the exterior, ie, make the bricks of the castle.  I soon absorbed the sobering news with a stiff drink, but was then abashed when the French student that just sat next to me glared at me and said:

“I ‘ait the Inglish.”  This was later followed by such remarks as “The Inglish are so stupid and pretentious.”  But do not worry, I gave as good as I got.  In fact I would say I had the upper hand until a Scottish girl joined in the conversation laying claim to an old alliance of the 13th centuary.  There was also an Irish lad which could have sealed the deal against me, but then he was Ginger like me which is a bond almost as thick as blood.  Together, we made a front against the Franco Scottish alliance and held firm.  The French girl Nina informed me that back home they called us ‘Roast Beef’ and this morning said “So ‘ow is Rost beef doing?”

“Fine thank you.  Now be a good Frog and hop along,”  I replied.  She took it in the best possible way.

The storm had passed by this morning but the temperature had dropped to -22 with wind and I was to be outside with Jukke Likealickalot.  The hairs in my nose didn’t freeze but my eyes watered and my eyelashes began to freeze up again.  I did however get to play with my old toy of last year the ‘moon walker’.  This is an mobile extendable arm that is the worst nightmare of anyone suffering from vertigo as it can go so high and is rather unsteady as the small cage you are in is shaking from side to side.  It also occasionally panics and begins to beep at you uncontrollably with red lights flashing so that you know that it is unsteady on its wheels and in danger of tipping over.  This would be a rather unfortunate incident, especially as I am carrying chainsaw and sharp chisels in my cage which I would like to add are now very, very sharp thanks to the wisdom of Uldis Zarins (www.artofuldis.com).

So tomorrow is our last working day and we have a lot to do.  I need to stay off the celebrations a little though as I am going husky sledding on Saturday morning which will be simply divine.  I cannot wait for that!  But until then I will enjoy the vast panoramic views of frozen Finland from the birds eye view of my moon walker.  And make some bricks.

Cheerio for now

Jamie.

Today I awoke with aching forearms.  I had been a fool by breaking two cardinal principles, never use blunt tools and don’t let yourself become cold.  I had been using a blunt chainsaw all day yesterday making some table ends and had had cold hands, eventually catching a bit of a chill which was cured later by the sauna.  My advice to anyone thinking of using a chainsaw is to make sure it is sharp and it you don’t know how then learn.  It will change your life.  Well maybe not.  I re-sharpened the chainsaw today on account of my aching forearms and it cut through the ice like butter, no resistance, I really should have sharpened it properly yesterday.  The second thing is to make sure you are warm, if you are working and your body becomes cold regardless of whether it is -20 or +5 degrees, you will get hurt.

Today it was -22.  I knew it was pretty cold before I saw the thermometer, the snow sounds like you’re walking on polystyrene and the cold bites at your skin.  As I walked out the door of the hotel the dryness of the air began to make me cough, the colder the air the less moisture it can hold, drawing the very moisture from your lungs.  But the real indicator was the hairs inside my nostrils beginning to freeze, I have never had this before, I could feel them stiffening up with frost and then crunching back to normal as I flared my nostrils, only to refreeze as I exhaled through my nose.  I then began to breath out of my mouth.

Luckily I was working inside the ice hotel again and I put on my warmest of cloths including my duck down jacket; Juha calls me the “bird murderer.”  I was quite happy in my cave listening to Florence and the Machine all cosy and warm.  I ventured outside to have a tinkle and was witness to the most hardy of chaps grimacing in the unbearable cold, faces all red as their bodies fight the cold.  Temperature is such a peculiar thing, inside the normal hotel it is unbearable to put on all the warm cloths in the morning  as it is just so uncomfortable with the stifling heat, but as soon as you are outside you cannot wait to get them on and are grateful for it as you feel the cold creeping through your cloths with its delicate frosty fingers.  “Keep out Jack Frost!” I say.  Thank God for ducks, whatever would we do without them.

Jamie

So here we are at the Ice Hotel in Kemi Finland. I’m one of the lucky ones as I’ve so far spent all my time inside my snow tunnel sheltered from the wind. Juha came by yesterday and complained that he had frostbite on his cheek from the wind as he’s been working outside most of the time. I just laughed but then offered my balaclava as a concerned after thought; he declined being a macho Finn. There is a lot of testosterone here, it is all men and everyone is yielding a chainsaw or some other sort of dangerous machine. The guys with the large chainsaws look pretty cool, but I think it must be the huge digger that has the final say, I would not want to mess with that. When we are walking around the site we have to wear a flashing head torch so that they can see us. There is one machine that is particularly daunting, this is the tractor that has a rotovator on the front, which churns up the snow and then spits it out onto the forms to make the snow walls. We were joking earlier in the sauna that if you got caught up in that your flashing head torch could be mistaken for a shooting star; quite a spectacular final farewell.

I’ve so far made a poster and a printing press and was today with my old friend Sergey from Russia who is making a Sibelius scene. Tomorrow I am in the snooker room making a bit of furniture. In the making of the hotel there is the construction team with the big machines and ideas, and then there is our small team of six who are like interior designers. We help make it look pretty. Until tomorrow.

Jamie

Today was the last day to finish our sculptures.  I cut away the snow with a blunt chainsaw to make the last sections of my nest whilst the other guys made all their finishing touches before the end of the competition at 2pm.  It is always a bit of a rush on the last day, there is often much more work to do than you first realise, especially with ice continuing to form on my eyelashes.   But we all got there, me having to do a little run now and again to warm up my hands which were freezing because of all the slush I was having to make.

Aside from the competition my mission for the day was to get a photo of Santa on his quad bike and to have a go at riding a snow mobile.  Santa minus reindeers is below.  Poor old rudolf has been usurped by 700 horse power, four cillindered quad bike with catapillar tracks.  But then I did not see the bike fly, so maybe Rudolf still has the advantage in the high season.

The snow mobile was incredible.  Mikka took me and Rodrigo on the lake a little faster than the ‘normal’ tourists.  This did not suprise me as we carraded through the snow at ridiculous speeds in the dark, always careful not to get too close to the person in front, just in case you hit them; “Snow mobiles slide you see.  And if you feel yourself going over water, just hit the throttle hard and go over it.”  This was another ‘Oh My God Moment.’  Rodrego and I adorned the correct gear and jumped on our bikes after a few novelty photographs with large smiles and waving arms.  And then down to the serious business of turning on the bike and hitting the throttle.  These things go fast, and I mean seriousely fast, charging accross the lake bouncing over all the bumps on the track and occasionally cutting through the virgin snow to make new tracks, scarring yourself now and again as you feel the mobile bouncing out of control underneath you, but then gaining confidence and letting the people in front go forward so that you can hit the throttle full just for a moment; hold on tight, because if you don’t you won’t have a snow mobile underneath you anymore.

We gathered for our ceremony where Christina and Satu had come to judge. They took us around all the sculptures to make their comments.  For my sculpture ‘The nest’  they were “wordless.”  I am now known as “Wordless Wardley”.  It is a good thing that I have nothing important to say.  Fortunately this did not go against me as I won joint first prise with Rodrego.  This was his first snow sculpture and a great success, well done lad.  Natasha came third with her Snail which I thought was great.  Afterwards we got on Santa’s sleigh to celebrate and he pulled us on his quadbike to his log cabin where we were given presents, I hugged him and all was forgiven for his shortage of presents this year.

So now we are just getting ready to find an ice sauna in the forrest, and afterwards take a taste of the local night life. I will have to recover on the plane if I manage to catch it.  Not the first time believe me.

Cheerio for now

Jamie

Today is New Years day and what a marvel it is to behold.  We saw the new year in by seeing a fire work display that was more like a scene from a war movie with low flying fireworks and the worst fire juggler on earth.

“Now I’m going to…has anyone ever tried to do a hand stand? “  We all cheer, if this is anything like the head stand that he did earlier then it is going to be great.  “Well, for my last act I am going to do a hand stand.”  We are all immediately impressed.  “But when I stand on my hands I am going to spin this stick that is ON FIRE with my feet!”  Oh my God.  Fire Man Sam them proceeds to do a hand stand with his burning stick in his feet, he then begins to actually spin the stick which is incredible considering his flailing head stand trick from earlier that looked like a dying spider on fire.  But he then unfortunately drops it.  “Thank you and good night!” he says with a mighty gusto that just earned him 500 euros.  This boy has some front.

Rodrigo was the first on the court, chipping away at his snow sculpture that is called ‘The Shadow.’  I then ambled out, cheerely listening to some more mellow music to start off the day, whilst cosely wrapped in all my warmest cloths to keep out the cold.  Unfortunately, my big down jacket could not protect my eyes.  I went to take some photos and found that my vision was a little difficult, I put this down to the cold wind but was then corrected by Timo who pointed out that I had ice forming on my eye lashes.  Ice should never form on ones eyelash.  It is silly cold here.

To warm up we plodded along to Misses Clauses hut where she serves the most delicious hot hot soup; moose yesterday and salmon today.  When you have six people sat around a table drinking soup at -20 degrees, the scene ironically resembles a Turkish Sauna with all the steam that is produced.  Santa Claus drops by sometimes on his Quad bike and I was lucky enough to have a chat with him over a full bodied cup of coffee poured from the black kettle from the fire.  It seems that Rudolf and the clan are resting up after a heavy Christmas; reindeer soup tomorrow perhaps.  I challenged Santa Clause on why I only received five presents this year.  It seems he has not been that impressed with my behaviour this year.

After having coffee with the Big Man I then had a quick spin on the husky sleigh which is so great everyone should do it.  Husky dogs are the most amazing creatures, grace and power combined with a pinch of speed thrown into the mix; especially on the down hill.

But then I still had a sculpture to make which is why we are here.  I made the eggs for my nest and all is coming along now, it no longer looks like a swirling mess and has developed some good forms.  I was gluing snow twigs on this late evening with buckets of slush that then freezes and holds  them in place.  Unfortunately, the slush also froze around my gloves, so much so that I could no longer move my hands and sculpt; a sculptor with no hands; how are we supposed to work in these condition?  Again, it is silly cold here and forced me to end my day.

So now to end the day it is Sauna time.  Timo says “Hi.”